Guinea Games [1-29-2016]


We don’t really want animals.  Let me clarify this for you.  I don’t really want any animals.  All my children for the most part are potty trained.  Our youngest still has her pacifier.  I have more than enough to do, without stressing about something that needs to go outside to pee and poo.  Especially if it is cold.  I don’t do the cold very well. 


My favorite seasons are Fall and Spring.  Two seasons which last about two weeks each here in Texas.  If you love the cold, I will send you a gold ribbon.  I can even call the media if you would like.  For the record, if I had endless amounts of land and income I would have an animal sanctuary.  In the words of my husband, “Shut your pie hole now.”  I can say that.  I can’t stand when he says it-go figure.   Did I digress?  Of course I did.  Oops!

We took our youngest to the pet store for the first time two weekends ago.  She loved it! She keeps asking to go back to the fish store.  We left contemplating getting the kids a guinea pig.  My dad says I did not need another hole in my rear.  If you do not understand the true saying based on that statement, I feel for you.  It’s an old school parent classic.  Anyway, that same evening, we leave my parent’s house with plans to pick up my brother’s guinea pigs the next day.  Woohoo! Yeah, there must have been crack in my mom’s tea. (But they really are pretty stinking cute!)  Her tea is pretty great as well.

Lord, please give me the extra strength and patience I already do not have to take care of these cute and fuzzy pain in my pattookis’ noise makers.    Please tell me that my house is not going to smell!  I don’t want to smell like a wild animal!  No amount of cuteness makes that okay!  Please argue that point with me when your super cute child has vomit all over the floor.  You love them, but cute is not the word you would use.  Be real.  God says do not lie.

So now I have seven human nuts and two rodent nuts to take care of.  Obviously, I am not nuts.  I have no marbles left.   One of these squeakers is mad that the other one won’t share his bed.  Sibling rivalry apparently has no bounds.  By the way, their names are Chimi and Chonga.  Ha!  Are we not just awesome!  Pray for us please.  Pray for overall family healing in all areas, and pray that these furry animals don’t die on us.  My brother will haunt me in heaven.  Promise.  You just don’t understand.

My daughter loves to give them their morning veggies.  They like to knock the hay bowl off the shelf onto the bottom of the cage.  I think they like knowing I can’t stand cleaning it.  Don’t even start on me about how the kids need to help.  Trust me, I got that covered.  It’s almost easier for me to do it when they are not home.  Then I only have to keep the toddler from scaring them into their next life.  However, I have no plans on getting rid of them.  They are now part of us.  It’s hard being an animal lover who doesn’t really want them full time.  I know it makes no sense.  It is what it is.  Besides, my children who only say hello to them would be devastated.  Mama’s you know we just can’t have any more drama.

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